the end of March (& the psychological implications of such a thing.)

of course it's important to be self-aware
aware of how you perceive,
aware of how you react,
aware of what you feel,
aware of what you do,
aware of how you treat others.

I learned today that it's also important to be aware of your position in space and time.
nothing profound,
it's just important to consider the date on a calendar when you wake up in the morning.

in a class that is more boring than class should be
(I described the events to a friend that was absent as so inspiring that the professor was "sweating beads of life from his head" - true)
another friend asked, "what day is it?"

instinctively i knew that it was March 29th
but out loud it went something like,
"March 29th. Wait, what?!"
a rush of thoughts associated with the end of March flooded my mind
- it's almost April!
- where did the time go?
- I have an assignment due on the 31st!
- exams must be soon..
- I don't have a summer job lined up..
- what if we can't pay the rent for May?
- rent is due this week.
- rent is DUE this week.
- ..check the bank account.
and all the while my friend laughed at something that is actually pretty hysterical,

i knew the date
but i wasn't aware of the date.

isn't that so true for where we can be in life?
floating by, knowing the fact that we are in the present, knowing what we're doing
and yet not being aware of it?

i read a blog today by Molly Piper which talked about, among many deep and complicating realities,
the simple fact that we should remember to see the world through the eyes of a five year old child.
with wonder,
with appreciation,
with the ability to grow and the willingness to do so.

to the point that we can truly be aware of where we are
in life.

"Why blame the dark for being dark? It is far more helpful to ask why the light isn’t as bright as it could be." - Rob Bell